New Adventures

December 13th, I sent my baby girl off to the Air Force.   This was the day after her 19th birthday and 12 days before Christmas.  The military was already preparing me to be a military mom.    A night spent at MEPS and off to San Antonio she went.  I received a quick call on the way to base, she was told that would be the last time she would be able to call.  So I took a deep breath and told us both we could do this.    To my surprise my phone rang at 3:30am that next morning with a call from my daughter saying, "Wake up mom and get a pen and paper."  she proceeded with, " while you are doing that I need to read something to you".  To be honest I have no idea what it was that she read.  She could have told me she was being held hostage someplace and I don't think I would have heard it.   I stumbled around my bedroom looking for my glasses then paper and finally found a pen in my office.  Forgetting to turn a light on, Samantha proceeded to give me her mailing address at boot camp.  I asked if I could repeat it back she said only if I did quickly.  Once I did she said she loved me and hung up.  OK that I wasn't prepared for.  I had in my head I wasn't going to hear from  and now I did.  My emotions starting all over again as I was woken from a sound sleep.  Don't get me wrong I loved the fact I could hear her voice.

Because she left so close to Christmas her first call to home came on Christmas Eve.  I had been hoping and praying for a call for the holiday.  It was my Christmas wish and it came true.  I was driving to my moms on Christmas Eve on a County Rd, in the middle of nothing.  An area I lose reception frequently.  Sky was with me in the front passenger seat dozing.  She was so peaceful.  I was talking to God thanking him for all the wonderful blessing he bestowed on me and my family.  At the end, I asked him to keep Samantha safe on her adventure.   A few minutes later my phone rang.  I looked down to see the caller ID was Samantha! I answer, "hi baby girl!".  To which came back a very horse, raspy squeaky voice saying, "I love you momma, I miss you!"  She was crying, I was crying.  All of a sudden Sky was up and in my face.    It broke me from my trance.  I told Sammy we both needed to stop crying because I couldn't understand what she was saying and I was on the road that I lose reception so I would call her back if I did right away. We both composed ourselves quickly and the dog didn't.  I had my ear piece in and Sky could hear Samantha's scratchy, raspy voice.  I was getting licked and pushed and loved up by Sky while trying to drive and hear Samantha.  It couldn't have been directed any better if it were in a movie.  17 minutes and 35 seconds later she said she had to go quickly.  She said she loved me and missed us all and hung up.  What a Christmas Present!!!

This week Samantha is in week 2 of her 8.5 weeks.  The week she arrived at San Antonio was the .5 week, only 6 more to go! 

I received my first letter this week.  It was dated before the phone call.  It filled in some blanks that I couldn't hear her on the phone call.  It explained that she is an Element Leader for her flight.  This means she is in charge of all 52 girls in the flight.  The girls can not talk directly to the TI (drill Sargent) they need to go through her.  Also, this means if the 52 girls mess up, Samantha does flutter kicks and push ups.  She said she is going to come home with cannons for arms doing about 400 push ups a day.

I am so proud of her!  Here is a photo taken at Thanksgiving, just a few weeks before she left.  Samantha ( has the long hair), Anna and our dog Sky.

As I learn more and here more I will share.

A Good Time For Change

The change in season is a reminder that everything changes, nothing ever stays the same, life moves on.  In business, I work with this every day, helping people overcome a fear of change.    Practicing what I teach, I decided to get out of my comfort zone and change something in my life.  I am an animal lover.  People say, if it has a broken something, Michelle will take it home and nurse it back.  My childhood was filled with ducks, rabbits, kittens, and lots of puppies.  By the way, any dog, no matter the age or size was a puppy to me as a child, ok it still is referenced that way.  We bred St Bernard's and Irish Setters, not at the same time.  One Christmas we had 20 little St Bernard Pups, six weeks old, ready to go as well as the 2 adult females and the male.  No I didn't live on a farm, yet it felt that way.  These were not the only breeds in our house.  We had Collies, Poodles and Mutts (AKA in my house as Heinz 57's).   My last dog, Brandy, was put down 12 years ago due to cancer.  Brandy was a challenging pup who suffered with horrible separation anxiety from birth on. Brandy was with me during a challenging relationship back in college, several deaths of close family, a back injury, marriage, children and a rocky divorce.  He was my best friend.

After Brandy passed, we wanted to get another dog and due to a move our new landlord didn't allow pets.  We were heart broken and tried to moved on.  Each passing year the kids would say, Mom can we get a dog now?  It really felt like something was missing in our lives.  This past summer change again came upon us.  The landlord said YES, you can have a dog.  It was with mixed emotion as it has been so many years since Brandy passed, it was still emotional for me.  I didn't know if I could bring another dog in my home without missing Brandy tremendously.

We have been advocates for is our local shelters.  Last month my oldest daughter, Anna, left for the Navy and the youngest  daughter, 18 yr old Samantha said, we NEED to get a dog!!  So off to our local Humane Society.  Samantha, shared with the Humane Society that we wanted the hardest to place dog as we had LOTS of love and attention to give.  Easy for her to say as she is leaving for the Air Force in December.    We took a tour of the dogs they had and many needed homes badly.  None grabbed my heart in that "special way".  I wasn't sure if it was my apprehension.   The following week Samantha persisted that we needed a dog.  While she was out one day I ventured to the Humane Society to look.  As much as I want to take them all home and care for them I need to be realistic and find one that I connect with.  Crowding was getting the better of the Humane Society, they had to double up some of the dogs and use some of the viewing rooms to house the dogs, my heart was breaking.    As I came in one of the workers approached me, recognizing me from the week before.  We talked for a moment and she said they have a few new dogs, returns.  I didn't understand.  Ann, the lady at the Humane Society explained they had a few pets that once home the new owners just couldn't handle them.  Tears welled up in my eyes as I tried to image the poor pet that had to go back to the Humane Society.  Ann then opened up a door slightly to have two noses peeking out.  A golden one and a brown one.  They belonged to an older Chocolate Lab, Cookie and a Golden colored Lab named Sky.  I sat on the bench in the room and Sky came and sat on my feet while Cookie brought me her tennis ball repeatedly. It was love at first sight!   I spent the next hour and half in the tiny room playing with the girls.  Dragging myself out of the room, I found Ann who shared their records and history.  Both girls are challenging, Cookie, likes to run and run away and Sky has separation anxiety.  I asked if it would be possible to take both as I just couldn't make up my mind or leave one or the other behind.  Ann said they would see what they could do as she put the adoption paperwork in front of me.  Later that night Samantha and I returned so I could introduce her to Sky and Cookie.  We played and walked the girls, talking about how well they get along as well as the pros and cons.  Samantha couldn't decide either which one of the girls and asked if we could take them both.  WOW going from no dogs to two!  What am I getting into?  After talking with the Humane Society they wanted us to look at Sky as she needed more one and one attention and if once she was comfortable then we could look at foster to adopt Cookie.  A meet and great with another family later that week was set up for Cookie also, so with kept our fingers crossed.  With mix reaction we took Sky home.  We were thrilled to have  her yet sad we needed to leave Cookie behind.  A few week earlier I wasn't sure I wanted another dog and now I was sad because I wasn't taking two home!

A few weeks later I stopped into the Humane Society to say hi to Cookie and give them an update on Sky.  I walked all over and couldn't find Cookie anywhere.  When I found Ann she shared with me Cookie had just left with her family about 5 minutes before I got there.  They LOVE her!  She found a perfect home with lots of room to run and kids to play fetch with her. The Humane Society was happy to hear how well Sky is doing and said when we are ready for a playmate to let them know!

It has been 6 weeks since we adopted Sky, photo above, and we are looking at a sister/brother for her.  She has taken over our lives.  My life had just started to become mine where I was coming and going as I wanted.  Now, we plan what we do and where we go around trips to the Dog Park, walks and cuddle time.   I wouldn't do anything different!

Change comes in strange packages.  Don't forget to open and enjoy them!  How are you changing?

How long is your road?

Have you even been on a road that didn't seem to end? Or ended too abrupt? How are you feeling when that happens? For myself, I can become angry, frustrated, sad and most important unproductive. This in turn makes no one happy.

Recently I found myself looking at a road that was ending to abruptly. It wasn’t one of mine. It did get me thinking. What if my road ends abruptly? Am I a doing everything I can to live each and every day to the fullest. I am the type of person that will reflect periodically on those things. For some reason this situation hit a bit harder.

My children are growing and leaving the “nest” so it is a time to look at what am I doing for me. I started by looking at the things I enjoy. For example, I am passionate about taking photos of the outdoors. Yes the photos on my blog I took. They are “ok” and I will continue to get better. To do so, I joined a photography club. Inexpensive practice!! I also have a passion for RSD Awareness. As I looked at this I noticed I have been lacks in keep up that website. I made a list of things I need to do to get it updated. Maybe even a new look!

Then I looked around….I am a bit of pack rat… I need to clean up some boxes! Sooner vs later. That was moved to the top of my list.

I also looked around at my relationships. Are there relationships that need some attention or work? Yep I found some of those. I made plans to spend time with those people that are important to me. I also looked at my business relationships, I have a few there that I have allowed be dormant. I am finding better ways to keep in touch with all of my customers. If it is through social media, twitter, facebook, utube, LinkedIn or this blog. Becoming more creative is a MUST!

These are just a few things in my life I found that if my road ended abruptly I would wanted to have had taken better care. What are some things in your life that need more attention? What could you or SHOULD you be taking better care of? Leave a post and let me know.

Relationships

In various parts of my life recently the topic of relationships has come up.  For example with customers it was how do you build stronger partnerships.  At an event it was how do you get involvement from participants.  In my personal life I have been asked advice on how to build a stronger bond with children and significant others. 

Today while catching up on my email I came across a book called  The 100/0 Principle.  This embodies what I think about relationships.  Now understand I am not perfect and sometimes I do expect something without giving or even after giving.  I aspire to be better.  Here is an a peice from the book:

The 100/0 Principle applies to those people in your life where the relationships are too important to react automatically or judgmentally. Each of us must determine the relationships to which this principle should apply. For most of us, it applies to work associates, customers, suppliers, family and friends.


STEP 1 - Determine what you can do to make the relationship work...then do it. Demonstrate respect and kindness to the other person, whether he/she deserves it or not.

STEP 2 - Do not expect anything in return. Zero, zip, nada.

STEP 3 - Do not allow anything the other person says or does (no matter how annoying!) to affect you. In other words, don't take the bait.

STEP 4 - Be persistent with your graciousness and kindness. Often we give up too soon, especially when others don't respond in kind. Remember to expect nothing in return.

At times (usually few), the relationship can remain challenging, even toxic, despite your 100 percent commitment and self-discipline. When this occurs, you need to avoid being the "Knower" and shift to being the "Learner." Avoid Knower statements/ thoughts like "that won't work," "I'm right, you are wrong," "I know it and you don't," "I'll teach you," "that's just the way it is," "I need to tell you what I know," etc.

Instead use Learner statements/thoughts like "Let me find out what is going on and try to understand the situation," "I could be wrong," "I wonder if there is anything of value here," "I wonder if..." etc. In other words, as a Learner, be curious!

Principle Paradox

This may strike you as strange, but here's the paradox: When you take authentic responsibility for a relationship, more often than not the other person quickly chooses to take responsibility as well. Consequently, the 100/0 relationship quickly transforms into something approaching 100/100. When that occurs, true breakthroughs happen for the individuals involved, their teams, their organizations and their families.

 
 
To find the book please check out: http://store.simpletruths.com/shared/StoreFront/default.asp?CS=simplet&StoreType=BtoC&Count1=605388820&Count2=522529244&ProductID=2060&Target=products.asp&cm_mmc=Responsys-_-TU-_-4.13.10-_-HUZO1a

What are you thoughts on this: Owning the brand. Employees & Customers http://ping.fm/gJMdD

Brand Managers: Think You're in Control? Think Again. http://goo.gl/fb/EvKiu

Going to Thrive Lunch at Genos in Fond du Lac Thursday. Join me?
www.thrivelunch.com

Positive Peer Pressure: A Powerful Ally to Change http://s.hbr.org/b3TpfK

Ten Ways to Use LinkedIn http://ping.fm/mti4t

Top 20 Social Media Rockstars (part 1)
http://ping.fm/zkvJV

How to Build Emotional Engagement in B2B marketing http://ping.fm/ijTmO

Social Media Success: It's About More Than Tactics http://goo.gl/fb/JlyTb

Building Your Credibility with LinkedIn. Part 5 of a 10 part LinkedIn series on the Social Media Sonar blog. http://bit.ly/6EWebi

5 Tips for Using LinkedIn to Find Star Employees http://bit.ly/bdDJEO

An 8-step plan for social media spring cleaning http://bit.ly/c3MgPv

Congratulations to KEITH STREBELINSKI for earning Highest Award for Achievement from Dale Carnegie
http://ping.fm/qY9nP

Can You Put a Value on Virtual Relationships?
http://ping.fm/iFSYH

Why smart job seekers are linked up on LinkedIn http://ping.fm/ibOck

Learn to Communicate Effectively. Sign-Up For A Free Session Here! http://ping.fm/uLKdD

Dale Carnegie's first principle

Criticize, Condemn, Or Complain.
Criticizing another person not only damages that person's reputation, but puts a dent in our own.

"You will find yourself refreshed by the presence of cheerful people.  Why not make earnest effort to confer that pleasure on others? Half the battle is gained if you never allow yourself to say anything gloomy."

Lydia M. Child
1802-1880, Abolitionist and Writer



See the right way and the wrong way to use this principle 
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hHvcLG936kw&feature=relatedDon't

From Twitter, LinkedIn and Facebook to Face-to-Face http://ping.fm/oIFvO

Aspiring Leaders: Stay Focused on the Big Picture http://ping.fm/ieWPv

Top 10 Meeting Mistakes
http://ping.fm/NloXS

Top 10 Ways for Mastering the Art of Recognition Writing http://ping.fm/pipaa

Employee Engagement Is An Employee's Job Too
http://ping.fm/OHOa8

See the right way & wrong way to practice Dale Carnegie Principle #4: Become genuinely interested in other people http://ping.fm/6xMsA

Holding on to anger, resentment & hurt only gives you tense muscles, a headache and a sore jaw from clenching your teeth. Forgiveness gives you back the laughter & the lightness in your life. – Joan Lunden

National Press Release

Dale Carnegie Training Launches First iPhone AppBusiness Training Leader Brings Traditional Values and Ideas to the Digital Realm
PR Newswire

NEW YORK, Feb. 25

NEW YORK, Feb. 25 /PRNewswire/ -- Dale Carnegie Training®, the international leader in performance-based workforce training and solutions, today announced the launch of its first-ever iPhone app (http://ping.fm/edmZx). Available for download through iTunes and already steadily rising the store's charts, the informative new application outlines basic human relations principles and shares easy-to-follow tips, techniques and daily "confidence boosters" exclusive to Dale Carnegie Training's world-renowned workshops and courses. Users who download the application will have access to the company's secrets of success for only 99 cents, allowing them to keep their professional edge sharp and truly "Stop Worrying and Start Living" in both their personal and professional lives.

"Think of it as a way to have a Dale Carnegie Coach in your pocket at all times," says Peter Handal, chairman, president and CEO of Dale Carnegie Training. "In this challenging economic time -- where people need every bit of help to stand out and ensure employment -- we believe there couldn't be a more opportune moment to offer Dale Carnegie's guiding principles in an even easier to access form."

Functions available via the downloadable application will include:

Valuable Tips on team member engagement, leadership development, sales effectiveness, customer service, presentation effectiveness, process improvement and more
Daily Doses of Confidence from some of history's best thought leaders
Video Demos of the Secrets to Success in action


About Dale Carnegie Training®

Dale Carnegie Training® partners with middle market and large corporations as well as organizations to produce measurable business results by improving the performance of employees with emphasis on leadership, sales, team building and interpersonal relations, customer service, public speaking and presentations and other essential management skills. The courses are available in 27 languages throughout the world; they cover the entire United States and reach over 80 countries. Dale Carnegie Training® includes as its clients 400 of the Fortune 500 companies. Approximately eight million people have experienced Dale Carnegie Training®.

Dale Carnegie's corporate specialists work with individuals, groups and organizations to design solutions that unleash your employees' potential, enabling your organization to reach the next level of performance. Dale Carnegie Training® offers public courses, seminars and workshops, as well as in-house customized training, corporate assessments, online reinforcement and one-on-one coaching.




Contact:
Meryl Weinsaft Cooper


meryl@laforce-stevens.com


212-242-9353 x119








SOURCE Dale Carnegie Training

Dale Carnegie Training Launches First iPhone App
http://ping.fm/X3SON

Find out the right way and wrong way to practice Dale Carnegie Principle #2: Give Honest, sincere appreciation. http://ping.fm/Rd1Qh

Find out the right way & wrong way to practice Dale Carnegie Principle #1: don't criticize, condemn or complain http://ping.fm/W2qRr

Process Improvement: Energizing Yourself for Change http://ping.fm/msSqw

"Respect must be earned over time. there are no shortcuts." ~~John Maxwell

"Throw yourself into work you believe in with all your heart, live for it & you will find happiness you had thought could never be yours”

Networking at The Bull Feb 16 Are you going to be there? Details & RSVP
http://ping.fm/VpslS

High Impact Presentations opportunity Limited Seating, special price! http://ping.fm/TDisw?eid=247309471944&index=1

High Impact Presentations Oppertunity Limited Seating, special price! http://ping.fm/sRDzC?eid=247309471944&index=1

The more often a man feels without acting, the less he'll be able to act. And in the long run, the less he'll be able to feel. C.S. Lewis

Tips for Creating Engagement During Your Presentation - from The Coachs Corner at Dale Carnegie

Ask a question and give people time to think. Don't rush to fill the silence.

You don't always have to have the answer. Sometimes, it is appropriate to offer to find the answer and get back to them or to turn the question back to the group for ideas.

Don't grade questions by saying, "That's a good question."

You want to thank those who respond to your questions by saying things like, "Thanks," "That's it," or "Sure."

If one person answers a question with an incorrect or inappropriate answer, help that person to save face. Take any part of the response that is correct and edit the rest to make it a correct statement.

Your voice, face, and body language must tell your participants that you want questions and responses.

Make eye contact so people feel you are communicating with them.

Avoid questions that have obvious "correct" answers, especially rhetorical questions.

Avoid asking questions that offer a "yes/no" response, unless it is to take a quick survey of the group.

Unless you are testing participant knowledge, don't ask questions that have one correct answer. Give some context, and then ask a question.

Put information into questions so that participants have enough context to respond correctly.

Prepare questions in advance to stimulate thinking, create interest, and add transfer of training value.

Always listen carefully to ensure you understand the full picture. Often, presenters listen selectively for expected responses and miss key points.

Be prepared to drop your agenda to focus on hot buttons for the group.

how I would use my time if I only carved out two-hours per week for social media

Suggested by Corey Perlman

5 minutes (x3) - update my Facebook fan page with something valuable for my fans. This could be a link to an article, a cool web resource, startling stat, provocative question, or something else. Total - 15 minutes.

20 minutes - Find one person or company on LinkedIn that I'd like to connect with. Use the "get introduced" link to have a mutual connection introduce the two of us so it's a warm lead instead of a cold call.

20 minutes - Update my blog with a story, article, video or something else that people in my field would find valuable. (extra 2 minutes to share this post on Twitter, Fanpage, and LinkedIn via Ping.fm)

15 minutes - Find local Twitter people to follow. I'd use nearbytweets.com or just the Twitter.com search feature and find people in my area to connect with. They will generally follow you back.
5 minutes (x3) Check my Twitter account to post or respond to people. I'll also use that time to print valuable information others have posted.

30 minutes - Take this time to either write one article or one press release or shoot a quick video to upload to YouTube. With all of these, I'll add my website address as well as a call-to-action to entice people to visit my site.

3 minutes to spare to Check espn.com, foxnews, cnn, or whatever you fancy. You earned it!


Try this for a few months and make sure to measure the effectiveness using metrics such as web traffic, new leads, your presence on Google keyword searches, and other creative ways.

I have been doing something similar.  Corey's way offers a more even approach.  I challange you to try it!  Let me know your results.  I'll keep you posted to mine!

New Year, New Decade, New thoughts, New ideas

Happy 2010!

A new decade has started with new hopes, new ideas and new challenges. I have decided to start blogging more consistently in 2010. My email is full of great ideas, articles and quotes that are passed along to me. I will be sharing those and possibly other items that come across my computer as food for thought. If you have suggestions, comments, ideas or care to add to anything I post please feel free.

I wish you all a happy, healthy and successful decade!

"Any fact facing us is not as important as our attitude toward it, for the determines out sucess or failure. The way you think about a fact may defeat you before you ever do anything about it. You are overcome by the fact because you think you are." ~ Norman Vincent Peale

~Michelle